Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Island Time!

My mind is currently on vacation in paradise. My body will catch up to it later this week. What am I talking about? My girls trip to the beach. I leave on Thursday and find myself counting down the minutes until I will have a cold drink in my hand, my toes in the sand, doing nothing more than watching the surf kiss the shore and enjoy the laughter that is found in close friendships.

I have to be honest, mentally, I cannot think of much more. So? What to do?
Why not take you with me?
The remaining days will be devoted to tropical escape. Think beach music (you can mute if you want, I won't hold it against you), beach food (I will be posting beach fare over at my blog, Plates and Places this week) and some beach stories of days past. Stories that I thought were worth revisiting. Some at my expense.....but, like the sign on my sidebar says, "blessed are those that can laugh at themselves for they shall always be amused".
So, mentally prepare yourself, come along with me for some surf and sand, a good tan, some great food.....and a whole lotta love. Come on! Let's hit the beach! Don't forget the sunscreen!
Speaking of being able to laugh at oneself....

This story first ran Wednesday, June 11, 2008. Here I am discussing a gag gone wrong when I was on a particular beach trip with friends.

Leigh's Nose Knows the Truth

A couple of years ago, there was a girls trip to the beach. There were two groups of women that went down. One group left on Thursday and another on Friday. I was in the Thursday group. At the time nose piercing had become a new trend among the younger crowd. We had stopped at gas station on the way down, and of all things, there on a turning rack were stickers that were little diamonds. A light bulb went off in my head. I bought them. For some reason, and I do not know why, my friends seem to pick me as the person that will "do anything". Not true. I like to have fun, but there is a limit to my fun. I am not daring or crazy. But people seem to perceive me as that person. But I tell ya what, I love a good joke or prank.
In the car, I announced my intentions, we would call and tell group two that "Leigh had gotten her nose pierced" on this "wild women's weekend" (actually just a group of middle aged moms). The phone call was made, and shrieks came forth on the other end, that "Leigh has gone gotten her nose pierced!!" at a made up name tattoo parlor. They wanted to "see it to believe it". And so on Friday evening, we awaited for group two to arrive. We were to meet them at a local restaurant. I pasted on my fake diamond nose ring and out the door we laughed and giggled all the way to the restaurant.

We had arrived at the restaurant first, and were seated at the table. The restaurant was a very nice, Cafe Grazie. It was dimly lit inside, to my advantage. Soon enough, in came our group. They got a glimpse of the light that flashed off the side of my nose. "I cannot believe you did it!!!". And so on the joke went, me, willing to go as long as possible to convince my group. Soon enough, our food was ordered and then brought to us. I ordered Alfredo pasta, undaunted by the calories because we all know on girls outings, calories simply do not count. As the evening progressed, my "nose ring" began to itch. It was an itch that needed to be scratched. But yet, it was a delicate situation, I didn't want to be obvious or worse yet, scratch off my new "diamond" and expose the truth to soon.

 I began to gently use my finger nail to scratch the surrounding area of the nose ring. Just then, I looked up. My eyes met a young gentleman who worked at the restaurant. He suddenly got a "I saw Ya" smirk on his face. My mind raced...... He thought I was picking my nose!!!! He thought he had caught me in mid pick!! I couldn't have him thinking it. I didn't want anyone to think me a "picker". It was at that moment, I began living a Seinfeld episode. You know the one, The very one. If you know me, you also know that things come out of my mouth as I think them...."Excuse me! Excuse me, sir". I shouted, my table looking on wondering why I was calling the man over. He looked over my way again, "Yes, sir, excuse me, can you come here, please?" The young man walked over with a huge smile on his face. "Sir, I think you saw me in a compromising position a moment ago", I blurted out. My girlfriends looked on, some giggling, others mouths gaping open wondering what I might be talking about. I went on, "I think you took me for a pick, but I want to explain to you sir, that there was no penetration". It was at that moment that things got loud.

Several friends began to choke on their food , and strangled on drinks. I knew what I meant. They hadn't a clue. There was laughter. Lots of laughter and other customers began to look over to see what the fuss was about. The guy laughed right along with my friends. "I know you think I picked, but I can assure you there was no penetration whatsoevah!" My friends were close to hysterics, I went on to explain myself, "You see, it's my nose ring, see? Right here? It was itching!". It was then that I lifted my finger to my nose to point out my gleaming diamond, I didn't understand why he had missed it. But then I understood, for it was gone! My friends then began to focus on my nose, "Oh, Leigh, It must have fallen out!" Ladies began to get on the their hands and knees, looking under my table, looking for my diamond nose ring!!!! 
The man, who now announced he was the manager, began to question what my "nose ring" looked like. The wonderful man that he was, was willing to assist this group of 12 women look for a....a nose ring. Of all things! What, for all he knew, had been inside some one's nose. We don't even need to discuss what goes on in a nose. "Uh, it's a diamond...." I wasn't about to call it a sticker."Oh, gosh! Get up off the floor!", I begged, "I know that it didn't fall down there, the booth was so cramped, it had to be.........in.......in........my pasta Alfredo!" Everyone looked up from the floor. "OH, no! The pasta!", one said. "Another said, "Oh no! You didn't eat it?"And so we began to dig, no one even looking at my nose, the focus was all about finding my diamond amongst my pasta dish. There we were, 12 grown women digging through the pasta with forks. I was not about to lose that ring, not after we had group 2 believing our little prank. I was determined to find my ring and proceed with them thinking I had gotten branded of sort on our girls trip.

It was a great gag and they were buying. This couldn't be happening.....NO. No! Not the Nose ring!!!!"Mam, please let me go and get you a new Alfredo dish for you to eat while you look for your diamond in that one", the manager insisted. "Oh, no! I will not allow it. It was my fault". "I insist". He repeated his kind offer. "No, No!" I begged. I might be ratted out. Ratting myself out.  It was then that I looked down, and by the grace of the dimly lit room, my "diamond" caught a ray of light and gleamed in my plate of Alfredo. "Oh my gosh! I found it". But of course, by now, it was in no shape to be a nose ring. The sticky on the back had been chemically changed by the high fat grams and hypo carbonated meal.  Imagine what it was doing to my thighs!

It was no longer. I began trying to stick it back to my nose. It was useless. The jig was up. I came clean, and apologized to the manager, who belly laughed for all it was worth, as did my friends. Thank goodness he had a sense of humor. And even after that, he once again told me he would bring me a fresh dish of pasta. I again, declined. But later he did bring over a dessert for all of us to split, "You all have made my day! Dessert is on me!!!"

And that my blogger "frans", is the infamous nose ring story.....So beware, should you ever consider a nose ring, that you too could be suspected for a picker. Do not be caught in a compromising position, a certain penetrator. Instead, consider a henna tattoo. I imagine the night would have turned out much differently had I done that. But then again, we wouldn't have gotten nearly as good a laugh and memory.....and bonus fat grams.

Life is good.

Hey- The Shabby Nest is hosting a great giveaway over at her blog. Be sure to check it out, enter, and tell her Leigh sent cha, ok?
Have a great day!


Kirby3131 said...

I almost felt as though I was there. What a great story! I am thinking of my trip too. I've been consumed with the thought of it for weeks now. I know a bit how you feel. Enjoy!!!

Jenny G said...

This is an awesome story, Leigh! I am laughing so hard right now! Please tell me there is a picture somewhere of you with this nose ring!!! You must post it!

Kelly said...

Oh, I'm so beyond jealous! My mind stays at some beach somewhere!

Keetha said...

I remember this nose story!!!

Will you be posting for us from the beach??? 'Cause if not - - - you can't go!!! ;-)

KBeau said...

Oh my goodness, that is so funny. LBeau and I are headed to the beach on Thursday as well, where we will join my sister and brother-in-law and brother and sister-in-law to celebrate my brother's 60th birthday.

We'll be in Destin at my sister's condo.

LauraBeth said...

That is hilarious - I can SO see you doing this. The visual is GREAT!

Mid-Atlantic Martha said...

Oh my gosh this was funny! I'm going to the beach this weekend - hubby and another couple -- no nose rings for us!

Kristy said...

I was so hoping this would be one of the stories that you re-told. It cracks me up everytime I read or think about it.. HAHA Hope you have a great trip and have stories to tell when you get back.

Carrie said...

What a great story!!!

Mari said...

I love this! It gives me an idea of the fun and laughs that will be happening at the beach!

The Hickmans said...

I remember that story!! I can't believe it has been a year already! I can't wait to hear more hillarious stories from this year. =)

funky bag freak said...

Leigh, I laughed so hard I blew soda out my nose (no ring involved) Man that hurt, but oh so worth the vision!

What an awesome story

Leigh of Bloggeritaville said...

Kirby-IRELAND! I would be unable to concentrate either! Lucky girl!!!

Jenny G- Sadly (NOT!) no one documented with a photo. I am usually the one deemed as the photographer on trips and I rarely take my own picture.In this case, as with most, I think it an advantage!

Kelly-come on with me. At least you can in you mind. Prop up a beach chair in the den, open up a window and let the wind blow in, crank up the mixer for tropical boat drinks, turn up the tunes on this blog...and have yourself a personal beach party. "It's more than a blog address....it's a state of mind!"

Keetha I doubt I will have any down time to post. And if I did, I think my friends would toss my "puter" off the balcony. LOL!
But you can bet I will be documenting and come home with many stories to tell.

KBeau... enjoy yourselves at your brother's 60th birthday. That sounds like much fun! I will be just down the beach! You might hear us laughing, or singing. Enjoy!

LauraBeth...I know you find it hard to beleive. NOT! LOL!

Mid-Atlantic Martha...no nose ring? LOL! I cant understand why? well at least you need not worry about it falling off into your pasta! Have a great trip!

Kristy...I am glad you got a laugh out of it. I have been praying for you. I hope your sweet boy is doing ok. HUGS.

Thanks, Carrie!!! Life is what you make it, HUH?LOL.

Mari... you know it! I am glad I could give you a chuckle today.

Hi Amy!! You KNOW there will be some stories. I cannot go anywhere with my motley crew without making some memories. Hope you are good. Hope your show went well.

funky bag freak... Now THAT makes me LOL! So glad!

Chandy said...

Leigh, wow what an adventure you had!

Anyway, will re read it more later, distracted with figuring out Mr. Linky! It's postdated for Wednesday, 9:30 PM! And I can't wait! :-)

Heart ya for asking me to cohost! Enjoy your travels, and be safe!

Kim @ Manning Family Tree said...

OMG!!! That was tooooo funny. I could just picture it. Priceless!!!

Tammy said...


That is almost the funniest thing I have ever heard. What a hoot!

Anonymous said...

On the floor! Girl you have a good time I can't wait to see what you do this time. Locked out of the blog again so got to post annon.
Love ya,

Sandi @the WhistleStop Cafe said...

Leigh~ you are cracking me up girl! I think the jewel needs to make the trip to the beach.

You had better take that camera with you. We need a beachin-getaway! Pack the sunscreen.

Leigh of Bloggeritaville said...

Chandy -I am SO appreciative! i Heart yoU for cohosting! BIG FAVOR!

Kim @ Manning Family Tree-glad you enjoyed!


Jessica-OH, no! Not again!

Sandi @the WhistleStop Cafe ...
you KNOW there will be a camera AND sunscreen. I am big on both.

Zinnia said...

I can read that story over and over and laugh just as hard every time. :) I love that you share your stories for those of us not fortunate enough to be present.

Laura @ the shorehouse. said...

HAhahahaha..."I can assure you there was no penetration whatsoevah"....OMG you are TOO MUCH! This story is hysterical...everything about it!